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Title: Deck the Tree with False Blossoms
Rating: PG-13 for language
Length: 2700 words
Fandom: Leverage
Recipient: lovelokest for yuletide 2009
A/N: I was lucky enough to grab this pinch hit and the story just sort of fell out of my head. Title from the Thirty-Six Strategems. Huge thanks to Lexie and Kaizoku for the beta!

See also: this story at AO3

( Once upon a time, they take a job they shouldn't. )

Title: Fright Night
Rating: G
Length: 2500 words
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (pre-Penny/Sheldon if you're so inclined)
Recipient: blueinsideout for sheldon_penny's Holiday Swap
Prompt: She asked for a haunted house, Penny convincing Sheldon to go, holding hands, and Sheldon getting freaked out (I'm paraphrasing her INCREDIBLY AWESOME request)
A/N: I OWE EVERYTHING, ESPECIALLY THE BEST LINES IN THIS THING, TO betternovembers. ILU BB ♥

( 'Come on, it'll be fun!' Penny wheedles. )

Title: The Wind's Like a Whetted Knife
Rating: R
Length: 775 words
Fandom: Big Bang Theory(/Star Trek) (Penny/Sheldon)
Prompt: "Penny and Sheldon are enlisted officers in Starfleet. Maybe they're just trying to fill their free time. Maybe one is the other's superior officer. Maybe they work together in the same department." on the sheldon_penny December kinkmeme
A/N: This is just a tiny snippet from the epic currently brewing in my drafts folder. OMG STAR TREK!BBT WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE. Title from John Masefield's "Sea-Fever", favorite of Starfleet officers, fictional sportscasters, and loopy candy magnates everywhere.

( Sheldon crowds against her before the door has even finished sliding shut. )

Title: Put Your Weariness to Rest
Rating: PG-13
Length: 760 words
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Penny/Sheldon)
Prompt: "The world's going to end, there's no way around it. Penny acts on a long-suppressed urge" on the sheldon_penny December kinkmeme (there are two other FAR MORE FABULOUS fics in reply to this prompt which you should read immediately)
A/N: At least the kinkmeme pushed me over my wordcount for the year? But this is not actually kinky, so, yeah. Title is, pretentiously enough, from the translation of Dante's Purgatorio sitting in the next room.

( Penny's never been accused of being a genius but what they're saying is blunt enough that she gets it. )

Deperately seeking distraction from Yuletide fic, so taking requests for ficlets!

288 words for dramedy, who wanted Sheldon's reaction to Twilight:
( 'Absolutely not,' Sheldon sniffed. )


279 words for damalur, who wanted Firefly, Mal & Zoe bonding:
( The troop ship wheeled away in the sky )


158 words for southern_heaven, who wanted Kings:
( The sun is shining for the first time in weeks )


and 186 words of Carnivale, creepy Brother Justin:
( Justin watched as Sofie moved awkwardly from the kitchen to the dining room )


192 words for inkdot, who wanted Carnivale, Ben/Sofie, soda:
( He meant for it to be a peace offering of sorts )


and 320 words of Friday Night Lights, Tim/Julie, soda:
( Friday nights were supposed to be easy )


297 words for cptnsubtext, who wanted Friday Night Lights, Matt/Julie, that almost first time:
( Here's the thing: Matt is ready. )


166 words for hondagirll, who wanted Psych, Gus&Shawn pre-series BFF:
( 'It has a heart on it, Shawn.' )

Title: Not All the Science Stuff Comes from Jesus
Rating: PG
Length: 580 words
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Penny, Meemaw)
Prompt: "bottles", paradox_drabble's first official drabble-a-thon
A/N: Uh apparently this is 2 of 3 in a drabble set with Meemaw? IDEK. I BLAME paradox_drabble FOR BEING AWESOME. Follows Knock Knock, followed by Alan Shepard Ain't Nothing but a Hound Dog)

( Penny was floating in the pool, warm water lapping against the side of her inflated raft. )

Title: & what should never be
Rating: R
Length: 1600
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Penny/Leonard, Penny/Sheldon, Howard)
A/N: Yeah, apparently I made a (Leonard/)Penny/Sheldon fanmixfic. And it's a prequel/sequel of sorts for Warm Gulf Wind!

What.

I'd really like to hear what you think - some of these artists are brand-spanking-new to me. Title from the Led Zeppelin song. Sheldon's final line originally belonged to Richard Feynman. Big thanks to inkdot for accomodating my crazy. ♥

( covers, minifics/tracklist & zip )

Title: Kafka, Schmafka
Rating: PG
Length: ~20000 words
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Penny/Sheldon, Howard, Missy, Raj, Leonard)
A/N: ...I don't even know. This is all fujiidom's fault. Also: vodka and pink lemonade. Mostly Maura though! I'd like to tell you why it's crackfic (with a major detour to Plottyville), but, um. It's kind of embarrassing enough that I wrote this? And I don't want to spoil the surprise. Yeah, that's the ticket. I don't have any idea when this is set but it's future-y. And possibly more AU than it seems? Basically I don't know anything. And there will be more Covalent Bond some day, oh yes, there will

Hugenormous thanks to the_wanlorn, without whom this thing would literally have never ended (ILU BEST BB), to julie_reads for not telling me to stfu, and to htbthomas for a really fast and helpful beta ♥

Part one | Part two

( Leonard stopped reading their orders off of the piece of paper on his knee )

Title: ERROR!
Rating: PG
Length: 325 words
Fandom: Big Bang Theory (Sheldon)
A/N: For sheldon_penny's Adhesive Duck (3x08) Drabblethon, quote #6 - "...Hello."


( While he prattles on about adhesive safety ducks )

Title: Lay Your Worries Down
Rating: PG
Length: 1200 words
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis AU (Teyla/Rodney)
Recipient: sara_wolf, in the 2009 Fall Fandom Free-for-all
Prompt: "SGA: Rodney/Teyla, earthside, living together"
A/N: Spoilerish for 1x09 Home: in this, Teyla travels to Earth with McKay instead of Sheppard. Because they're doing it! Unrelated to the universe of In the Hollow Tree. Title from Eric Clapton's Lay Down Sally. There might be more to this story, there might not. Who can say!

Big thanks to salixlikescake for the beta! Glad you're feeling better ;)


( Teyla's first glimpse of her team's homeworld was of bright golden lights and dark hulking buildings streaking past the tinted windows of their ground transport. )